- Sometimes (or even most times) it is probably in your best interest to remain silent. One often thinks you have to look at the world as though you are watching a movie. Everyone around you are actors telling you a story, and it is your job to be the audience and to do nothing but ponder.
- Everyone has an agenda. Nobody does anything without hoping for some kind of result. There is nothing wrong with that but it depends where their agenda stems from. And also, it depends on what a person considers what the definition of 'winning' is.
- You should all try to have real plants in your house. Only a bit of Mother Earth could make a dump look cosy.
- In life, you will often be distracted from your dreams and sense of self by someone in authority, or someone you actually respect because they have the ability to sway your thinking. It is important to hear them as advice, rather than an order...no matter how bossy they can be. Except of course if it's your boss getting you to do something...such as your job.
- We are going too fast. The world is spinning. You do have the ability to slow down though. When you're finished reading this, switch off your computer and go do something else.
- Smell the roses.
- Girls...if you are feeling tired, unattractive and unenthusiastic about dressing up then you probably need to have some sex. Like you need to be fucked, and you need to be fucked well.
- What? You are having sex and you still feel this way? You're doing it wrong.
- Put a bit of Malibu in your hot chocolate. Have your winter with a dash of summer.
- How old will you have to be to realise that you don't have to do what everyone else is doing? Hmmm?
- Conversation comes from a dialogue, not a monologue. Stop just waiting for the other person to finish talking just so you can hear the sound of your own voice.
- You can't change the way people perceive you. You can't even get angry about it! The issue lies with how you perceive yourself. Don't make your problem someone else's ... if you know what I mean.
- Quit being so bossy! You're annoying.
- Egg salad i.e. boiled eggs, mayo and cress is a divine thing to put on a freshly toasted bagel. It's retro AND it is tasty...two great things.
- When it comes to style, the trick is to be inspired and not a copy cat. Don't be too literal. Literal fashion is tacky and worst of all, it's corny.
- #all #those #instagood #instagram #hashtags #underneath #all #your #photos #make #you #look #desperate #for #attention
- Act like a lady, think like a man.
- If your sheer goal is to become famous then you will probably achieve it.
- But happiness will take a little longer.
- Every girl needs a red lipstick in the shade that suits her, a good quality black dress, high heels and a good attitude. This way, you will always have something to wear.
I went on a date with a younger man and I wrote about it for Acclaim Magazine. Read all about it.
- 'I don't know if I ever want to get married' - this is a defence mechanism girls use in case they don't and then they come across like it was their decision. It's fine to want to get married, it's not about religion or institution etc etc, it is about love. Yes, love. If it was about anything else but love then the gays don't have a case. And if it is about legal matters such as financially protecting yourself then we wouldn't be so picky, would we? Wanting to get married should be like wanting a Chanel handbag....you might never get it but that doesn't mean you should stop trying.
- 'I'll just eat this mac and cheese and then I will start my diet in the morning' - Guess what fatty? Tomorrow never comes. The time is now!
- 'I'm just with him for the sex, I don't want him to be my boyfriend or anything' - You're right, you don't want him to be your boyfriend, but you are happy for him to act like one so you feel comforted while you look for someone who is boyfriend worthy. This is why dudes think we are bitches by the way. We know right from the start that he is not right, but we string him along anyway because it feels nice to have someone who sends you messages and who will fuck you therefore leaving you feel desired and wanted. Look, it's understandable but it is toxic (for you and for him). Hey your self worth called, she is looking for you!
- 'People need to accept me for me' - Great attitude! Now, if you were less of an asshole then you would feel a lot more accepted. Generally people love different people! Why? Because they are interesting. But if you have zero self awareness, talk about yourself constantly and have more photos that you have taken yourself in your bathroom mirror than you've had hot dinners then chances are you don't really need many friends to tell you how wonderful you are because you are doing a good job of that on your own. Or are you like that because you are trying to convince yourself how wonderful you are? Irony is a beautiful 'ting.
- 'I am not like most girls' - Yes you are.
- 'I'm not going to stoop to her level' - You just did.
- 'What's wrong? Nothing.' - Another reason why guys think we are head cases...passive aggression.
- 'You're not fat!' - We call ourselves fat out loud all the time and we say 'I have eaten so much junk today' out loud all time and here's the thing: If your friend is obviously not fat...like she weighs less than 75kg and generally eats well then she is saying these things because she is looking for attention and validation. When a chubbier girl, who is blatantly unhappy with the way she looks is saying these things, she is crying out for help. The worst thing you can say to her is that she is not fat and then take her out to dinner to the latest American diner food place to 'cheer her up'. Flip the question the next time she asks if she is fat, ask her 'Do you think you are fat? Are you happy? If not, what are you going to do about it? It's not even about being thin or fat, it is about being happy and comfortable. Some people are chubby and cool with it and that is just fine, while others have emotional relationships with food. If we had a friend who had a drinking or a drug problem, then we would say something. But why not food? Why is this such a sensitive issue? Because if you say something you come across as rude? Well, quite frankly, it's rude not to.
Guys, guess what? I burnt my left boob on my curling tong. It was on my bed and I was topless and I stretched across my bed to grab my phone and a very loud and very distinct 'SSSSSSSSS' sound was heard and white hot searing pain shot through my chest and I had, in fact, given my tit a 3rd degree burn. After the weeping (myself and the wound) and as it began to heal after about a week I began to put BIO OIL on it so that I wouldn't scar. The next day I could already tell a massive difference. I was like Jesus had come during the night while I slept and put his hand over my breast. The pervert. Anyway, bio oil...I'm about it.
I say this about every foundation I review on here but I am in love with this Stay-Matte foundation by Clinique. Fuck, I love all Clinique foundations actually! Especially when it comes to value for money. They are on average 50 bucks and whilst Armani Face Fabric is by far the Beyonce of all foundations, sometimes I just can't part with $90, you know? I did use this Stay-Matte stuff over summer though, when my skin is a little oiler than usual so I might change for something a little more dewy when this is up for winter. But I doubt it to be honest, because I can't fault this guy one bit. It covers, it stays in place, it doesn't crease, it's a dream basically.
Whilst at the Clinque counter I got suckered in to buy the powder as well. Truth be told, I'm not usually a fan of loose powder. Not because it is crap but because it seems messy and like a lot of effort, like you can't really carry it around with you and stuff. Well, I am glad I got convinced by that white robed minx to buy this because it sets my make-up perfectly. Also, remember how I had bought that Smashbox face brush? Well it goes perfectly with the Clinique loose powder. I enjoy powdering my nose whilst wearing my silk kimono and listening to Ella Fitzgerald. Ok, I did it once but I enjoyed it.
My favourite youtube beauty gurus Pixiwoo brought out a line of make-up brushes called Real Techniques and I am a huge, huge fan. I find that make-up brushes are the most irritating things to buy when you're not like this amazing make-up artist because you don't really know what you are doing, therefore you end up just using the shitty brush that comes with your products and those things are about as useful as a chocolate teapot. These clever girls have cut out all the crap and by crap, I mean the MAC cosmetics 59 and 567 and 235 number for their brushes...what a pile of wank! How confusing does it actually need to be? Not at all when it comes to these brushes! Go onto the site and the girls have done a tutorial on each brush and make it nice and simple for us everyday make-up users. Plus, they are cheap! And for Aussies they are stocked in Priceline. Winning all round ladies.
Another fabulous thing came into my life in yet another tube and it was sent from Heaven aka Evo. It is a sealant to put on the ends of your hair to help mend and/or prevent split ends and it works! If you bleach your hair or use heating tools or if you're not bald then you have split ends and they are evil little assholes. I love this stuff because you can put it on wet or dry hair! Because you know how you buy stuff that can only be applied to wet hair and you only remember that you have it once you have already dried your hair? Well, with this it dun matter! Oh what a small life I lead.
I have written many other beauty posts and you can spot them here
- Back in the day, one's opinion used to be based on fact, not passion or emotion. Whatever happened to that?
- Instead of counting the things that you have loved and lost, try counting your blessings for instant gratification.
- Ladies, if a man is fingering you, never allow him to use more than three fingers...even if you can take it! You are a woman, a goddess and your vagina is your majesty. Be kind to it.
- Starchy foods such as white bread, white rice and potatoes don't help with weight loss. They fall more under the 'weight gain' category. As do processed sugar and booze. Fuck, I would love to live in a world where woman just don't care about their bodies but I don't. It does exist though! But not in the first world. Here we are surrounded with a abundance of everything and we are suckers to gluttony.
- Eat less white bread and potatoes and read more books. It's all fair and well to look good, but it's useless if you are thick in other senses of the word.
- Stop shopping! Stop consuming! Stop filling your wardrobe up with crappy, throw away fashion. Buy less but buy well and wear often. Focus more on status which comes from consistency and not statements. Get off that consumer treadmill.
- Have you guys worked out your signature dish yet? What is it?
- To honestly love comes from lack of judgement.
- If he has a girlfriend, then leave him alone. Let's bring back the sisterhood!
- Vanilla Ice said it best: Stop, collaborate and listen.