SEX

Owls SEX alphabet: X Y Z

X – is for XXX. Triple X. Adult films. PORN.  Remember when people use to call them ‘blue movies’? WHY? Can someone share some light on this please? Anyway. We have come a long way in regards to this issue. Gone are the days where [...]

2011-03-12 // 4 Comments

Owls SEX alphabet: S – W

S – is for SEX. Sozz. Nothing wack here…just plain old sex.  I have kind of dug my own hole regarding this blog, because now I have created this online persona of being some kind of sex expert. I most certainly am not. I just know what [...]

2011-03-02 // 4 Comments

Owls SEX alphabet: M – R

M – is for MAKING OUT. Nobody makes out anymore! It’s just usually a little bit of a kiss and then BOOM! straight for the crotch. But what about kissing until you get beard rash (better known as ‘pash rash’ in this eloquent [...]

2011-02-19 // 2 Comments

Owls SEX alphabet: G – L

G – is for GAGGING. Men are sadistic bastards. They get aroused at the sound of you gagging. But then again, I suppose it does give them the feeling that their member is just so large that you can’t fit your itty bitty mouth around it [...]

2011-02-09 // 6 Comments

Owls SEX alphabet: A – F

A – is for ANAL. Obviously. It seems more and more dudes think it’s on the menu of late.  I mean, it’s a pretty gnarly thing to take it up the Jones hey?  Like, we’re not actually meant to do that. Dudes just see a hole and [...]

2011-02-05 // 6 Comments

Take my advice…I don’t use it anyway. Part 61

DUDE, PRACTISE YOUR SEX FACE IN THE MIRROR Nobody wants to be fucking the scary dude in the white mask from ‘Scream’.  Just be aware is all I’m sayin. SIGN UP TO SOME KIND OF AIR MILE PROGRAMME Don’t you like free things or [...]

2010-08-19 // 0 Comments

Take my advice…I don’t use it anyway. Part 58

WHEN YOU BID ON THINGS ON EBAY, YOU HAVE TO MAKE SURE YOU HAVE ENOUGH CASH MONIES IF YOU WIN – It’s not pretend. YOU WERE NEVER AS FAT AS YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE – And you will never be as thin as you are now. IF HE ONLY RINGS YOU [...]

2010-08-05 // 5 Comments

Take my advice…I don’t use it anyway. Part 19

  JUST TO TOUCH ON AN EARLIER POST…   The following should also be avoided being used as lube: olive oil, Vaseline, lube that is made to ‘tingle’ (some sadistic bastard made this), hand cream or any other kind of [...]

2009-11-28 // 6 Comments

THE ONE NIGHT STAND

  KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GETTING YOURSELF IN FOR Do you think you might like the guy? Are you able to do this and not feel the need to compulsively message and facebook stalk him afterwards? Are you sure you are doing it because you are really horny [...]

2009-11-24 // 8 Comments

ALL HAIL THE BUSH

FOR BOYS ONLY So here we go then. A guide for you fellas in the art of cunnilingus. (‘Going down on us’ for the slow one’s). Believe it or not, there are a few woman who do not enjoy having their bit’s licked – they are [...]

2009-11-11 // 10 Comments

Honey, they don’t call it a job for nothing.

OK, so I’m just gonna say it from the start. This is a blog about blow jobs. Now I have to be careful here because my dear mother reads my blog entries. But I did dish out some advice in an earlier entry advising that you should learn to give [...]

2009-10-17 // 2 Comments