SOMETIMES LIFE THROWS YOU A CURVE BALL
Actually not sometimes…pretty regularly actually. I reckon we all get the same amount of curve balls in a lifetime but the intervals are different. Like some of us have nice, sporadic curveballs over a period of time with space in between to breathe whilst others, get curve ball taxis i.e. three at once or none at all. This goes out to all of those experiencing more than two fuckshows at one go: There is light at the end of the tunnel so keep on swimming. Or just eat a lot of chocolate, smoke some puff and have a wank.
HAY FEVER IS IN THE AIR!
The best things in life are free except for Spring because you pay your ass off for that bastard. The pollen is palatable! We know! But could you all carry around a tissue? The sniffing! Oh my God the sniffing.
IT’S NOVEMBER SO IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY REALISED THEN LET ME REMIND YOU…
…that you need to start saving. ‘Living on the Edge’ is retarded. You’re not a free spirit, you’re not invincible to the elements and to the things that are out of your control so you need to be, as they say, prepared. Also you/we are getting old every single day, every second, every hour. Yes live in the present, yes you are enjoying yourself NOW but you better hope you don’t raise dead beat kids who can’t look after you when you’re old or else you are effed.
PEOPLE CAN BE SHIT.
But they can also be really nice too. Don’t forget that.
IF A LITTLE WEE COMES OUT WHEN YOU SNEEZE THEN YOU NEED TO DO YOUR EXERCISES BECAUSE YOU HAVE A LOOSE VAGINA.
Ladies with hay fever….am I right?