The things that will make you look like a slut

RIDICULOUSLY SHORT SKIRTS IN MID WINTER – You don’t look hot, you look cold and uncomfortable.
STRETCH SATIN – Why not just wear a fishnet bodysuit and get it over with?
TAKING IT IN THE BUM THE FIRST TIME YOU GET DOWN – Come now lassie. I’ve told you before…keep the party tricks for later…or else home boy will get full way to early…ya get me?
GETTING YOUR TITS OUT WHEN YOU’RE DRUNK – Or in front of his friends.
FLIRTING WITH HIS FRIENDS – There is banter and then there is, ‘Hey, we should watch porn together some time’
YOU FORGET THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD SEX WITH – I’m not gonna lie…it’s a concern.
YOU HAVE HERPES – Again…it’s concerning…for many reasons.
YOU DON’T KNOW WHO THE BABY DADDY IS – I say pick the richest one.
THE PERSON YOU’RE FUCKING IS MARRIED OR HAS A GIRLFRIEND – Check yourself. You deserve better. And so does she.
YOU BEGIN TO REALISE THAT THERE IS NO ONE LEFT IN YOUR GROUP OF FRIENDS TO HAVE SEX WITH – Even the girls.
GIRLS ARE NEVER KEEN TO LEAVE YOU ALONE WITH THEIR MAN – Please girl, sort your fucking life out.
YOUR VAGINA HAS BASICALLY BEEN A REVOLVING MAN DOOR AND MORE THAN TWO GENTLEMAN HAVE TAKEN A SPIN IN UNDER A WEEK – Unless it’s a one off…ehrm, *cough* cough*
Hey, I know I may cop a bit of shit for this…mainly because I scream and shout about sexual equality for women…but there is a blurred line between being a sensual female who enjoys taking a lover from time to time and likes to explore her sexuality, and being an insecure cum bucket who uses sex as balm for her lacerated self esteem, comprende?
*If you have ever encountered the dreaded ‘herp’ or the ‘clap’ then it doesn’t necessarily make you a slut. I’m sorry. But if you don’t know who you could have got it from …well…
XXXO

5 Comments on The things that will make you look like a slut

  1. Anonymous // 2010-08-10 at 12:08 AM // Reply

    omg! I totally know someone who should read this! love your blog!

  2. Link her up baby. Thanks for the love x

  3. hahaha i love it! your blog always gives me a good old giggle but at the same time thinking, so true. :)

  4. 'You forget the last person you had sex with' – maybe he was that forgettable or you haven't had sex for a seriously long time!

    'insecure cum bucket'…love your work :)

  5. Don't worry WJ, my memory has elapsed me too 😉 x

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