Grab the Wheel and say NO baby

OK…I’m probably about to lose alot of readers after this post, but I have had it up to *here* with this label, and I’ll tell you why.  Firstly, I am not a fashion blog and I have never claimed to be…mainly because I am not a fan of the stock standard fashion blogger…wanna know why?  Because their ‘opinions’ are never honest.  99% of the time I have seen blog posts humping the leg of some shit fashion show like it was a Marc Jacobs at NYFW or some shit.  Mean time it looked like Spotlight had a sale on and they had to put some crap together in under 10 minutes ala Project Runway.  Then these ‘fashion writers’ blog about how ‘innovotive’ ‘gorgeous’ ‘amazing’ it all was.  Vomit bucket please.  I don’t doubt that these designers have talent, but don’t be telling them lies because they will live under the illusion that they are the next Stella McCartney or something.  Ugh whatever, its a kiss ass industry…and I am happy to be the Simon Cowell amongst the Paula’s.  ANYWAY, I digress from the subject at hand…Wheels and Dollbaby.

I have been familiar with Melanie and the label for many years.  And while it was not love at first sight, it definitely grew on me and I would almost call myself a fan…almost.  W&DB; is a Western Australian fashion success story, and after living in Perth for the last 3 years, I totally get how anything reaching that kind of level in the fashion industry from this small town would be a major coup.  I get it.  Being a curvy woman myself (curvy meaning about 5 hot dinners away from being a chubba) I appreciate a designer who enjoys tits and ass, and the 50’s pin up look definitely embraces said glands.  I understand the labels vision and have been impressed with how they have stopped themselves from going from ‘risky’ to ‘trashy’, as the line is thin as thin can be.  Until now that is …

I attended the Wheels show on Monday night, I bet they regret giving me the free ticket now because I am about to rant my ass off.   I refuse to write a post about how fucking incredible it was when in actual fact, underwhelming would be a better description.  The show was a sell out (of course it was always gonna be) and the crowd were um, OK.  So, bums on seats, lights go out and 3 washed up has beens step out, aka The Divinyls (oh how rock n roll) I actually thought they played tribute at The Moon and Sixpence on a Sunday…my bad.  It’s not that impressive actually because Melanie Greensmith’s partner is Mark Mcentee from the bloody band.  And by the looks of things, they didn’t even scrub up for the occasion.  Oh fuck you if you think they were good, you are lying! You know they weren’t!

How often do you think she has to get something down from the shelf for him?


So the models come out.  All hot.  All have zero tits…but whatever.  The clothes are cute.  But nothing we haven’t seen before.  Same garments, different prints and fabrics.  All polyester.  Ha ha, I kid…I don’t know if it was poly blend…I just said that for effect.  Anyway, yeah the clothes were mmmkay.  The models were better.  The little pink bathrobes at the end were the highlight for me.  Black liquid eyeliner, red lips, fake beauty spots.  All chic.  All retro.  It was ‘nice’. Ronnie Wood’s daughter Leah came out at the end and gave us a song, which was cool.  All in all, a good show.  Mediocre but good.

So now here’s my beef.  A W&DB; dress retails for around $300 on average.  And I should know, I shelled out on a little black number last year but it was worth every penny.  It hugs every curve and makes my tits look great.  The problem is they don’t make many of these well fitted, beautifully cut dresses.  Well if they do, they ain’t in the King Street store.  All they seem to be churning out are those bloody singlets with the logo on it which goes for around 80 bucks.  Something the kids can afford!  And by golly do they buy it.  Then they murder it with some shit jeans and flip flops.  Gone is the vision of the retro look of yesteryear.  Gone is the sultry, suggestive hint of thigh and its all just a bunch of girls with bad taste, a ‘sick sleeve’ and a washed out singlet.  Wanna hear what else?  I was in the boutique 2 weeks ago and they had a plastic sale bin in the middle of the floor with ‘SALE’ written in biro on an A4 piece of paper.  Um…yes.  Then there are the bimbos who love any oppertunity to look like a slut, and think they are ‘Dollbaby’s’.  Oh God.  And boy do they get it wrong.  They would do more for the brand if they wiped their ass with it.  You wanna snag a millionare, instead you snagged a pimp.




I love you Mel but sort it out!  The bogans are raping your label!  And you ain’t helping.  Raise the bar!  Keep it out of reach from the peasants.  Fuck, now I hear you are stocked in General Pants too?  Oh God.  What’s next?  City Beach?




I’m sorry if I have ruffled any feathers, but it’s just what I do.  I love W&DB; too, but I just hate how they seem to be dipping to a level that is beneath them, instead of expecting their buyer to step up their game.  I mean, fucking Burberry nearly went under when the famous print was seen more on the chavs at a football game than on the Sloane Rangers of Chelsea.  Sure, they coulda cashed in on it, but instead they got ‘ol Katie Moss on board and gave themselves a make over.  Brand integrity and longevity should be the priority, for long term profitability.  Hey man, I could make loads more money if I became a stripper, but then…how do I want to be remembered?

9 Comments on Grab the Wheel and say NO baby

  1. Totally agree. I'm a big WDB fan and the smallest have ruined it!

  2. Anonymous // 2010-09-15 at 10:11 PM // Reply

    Agree so much. Everytime I go into the store there are orange faked tanned, black and white blonde hair bogans in it. Usually with roided up boyfriends in toe. I honestly want to spit on them for tacking up wheels.

    i also love the height reference hahaha

  3. Melanie *is* a total bogan!

  4. Yup, I'd have to say I agree with most of this. I love the brand but have seen it worn in the trashiest of ways lately. I was as the show on Monday too and was sick of all the focus on "celebrities" by the end of the night. And half the people hanging around that weren't "famous" wished that they were. It was enough to make me leave the party.

    I must admit, it won't stop me loving it and forking out for their classic, amazing cut pieces though :)


  5. Don't stop Shell. It can look slammin if its worn right :) I just get annoyed when hype out weighs substance ya know?

    N: totes.


  6. Bogans think wearing prestige logos might make up for the class which they lack.
    Instead of 'being' the things W&DB; is supposed to represent, they expect the logo to do it for them while they continue being a douche. bad publicity right there. That's the slippery slope of mass consumerism for you.

    In this case honesty was definitely the best policy.

  7. Sup Owl…
    I actually AM fashion blogger, and I wrote a good post on it, I like their style, their "concept".
    Couldnt agree more how many ferals were there sporting tshirts :S Only one girl had a killer silk / tulle dress on.
    Theyre not that classy. Makes me think of Von Dutch or Ed Hardy, bogan couture?
    IDK, very debatable.

    Anyway, you havnt lost me as a reader :)

  8. Oh! and mass agreement with Gem :)
    So truee~!!!

  9. Anonymous // 2010-09-17 at 6:08 PM // Reply

    The problem is fashion bloggers walk a fine line. A few were banned from this years PFF for speaking their mind and being critical.

    Kiss-ass or fuck-off should be the slogan of PFF.

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