Being a woman of no nonsense and a general ‘dark’ sense of humour, I tend to find that most of my friends are male. This is not a conscious decision but more of a natural development. One of my dearest and dare I say it, oldest friends, is from Cape Town where he still resides. We have a shared interest in the movie ‘Mean Girls’, Jack Daniels and books about women psyche. He is a talented writer who has yet to learn the art of self promotion. His work can be found in old editions of the South African skateboard and music magazine, ‘Blunt’. He also runs a blog which will literally make you piss your pants with laughter. http://www.spikesavage.co.za/ He has an acute and funny take on pop culture and was pretty much my inspiration to start putting my writing out there. He would also never in a million fucking years agree to do an interview in order for me to give him a bit of a plug on Obnoxious Owl, so I asked him a couple of questions during one of our daily transatlantic emails with the intention of posting them. Here are a few tit bits of conversation, just so that you can capture the very essence that is SPIKE SAVAGE. Sorry Spike, you’ll thank me later.
OWL: Explain the hate for skinny jeans please…
SPIKE: What’s to explain?? There’s skinny jeans and then there’s jeans that look like after wearing them they would leave you sterile. Jeans are meant for wearing, not as forms of contraceptive.
OWL: Ha ha, so you are saying that you have never actually tried on a pair?
SPIKE: Thats abso-fucking-lutely what I’m saying. I’d probably sooner buy a pair of panties than a pair of skinny fit jeans. At least that would be funny.
OWL: I’m gonna send you a pair…
SPIKE: You might as well send me some denim coloured spray paint. And a scalpel to remove my testicles.
OWL: Hey, remember we went out for dinner that time with ‘that woman’?
SPIKE: Oh yes, dear God. And we had to leave so I could get home in time to watch America’s Next Top Model.
OWL: America’s Next Top Model is the best show that ever lived.
SPIKE: I know, it’s one of my all time favourite reality shows. This chick I know kicked me in the balls once, so to get her back, I told her who wins ANTM.
OWL: Ha ha, God that’s funny. The best and worst thing about that show is Tyra Banks…
SPIKE: Yah. I HATE HATE HATE it when at the end of the show she’s doing the elimination and she goes all softly, ‘You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Model’ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH KILL MURDER RAPE KILL MURDER RAPE!!
OWL: Oh my God I just nearly fell off my chair, I’m going to die laughing. So how is South Africa’s new president? Jesus, that was so funny that time you said he looked like a ninja turtle.
SPIKE: Ha ha. Well the truth is, and it might be a reflection on my absolute apathy and non-involvement in this country, but if I didn’t know we had a different president I wouldn’t have even noticed.
OWL: That is fucking hilarious.
SPIKE: So apparently you have a photo of me in bed with a homeless person?
OWL: Oh do I ever. You were so drunk one night on Long Street in Cape Town, that you SPOONED a homeless guy in a doorway and kept shouting ‘Take a photo! Take a photo!’ I actually cannot quite believe you did that. That was like 5 years ago now.
Check out the rest of Spike’s ‘take no prisoners’ opinions on chicks, music and life in general at http://www.spikesavage.co.za/